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Don't Come Knockin' ...

16 Jul 2007 01:20 pm

I don't always like David Denby, to say the least, but this essay raises a lot of good questions. Here's a snippet:

“Knocked Up” ... feels like one of the key movies of the era—a raw, discordant equivalent of “The Graduate” forty years ago. I’ve seen it with audiences in their twenties and thirties, and the excitement in the theatres is palpable—the audience is with the movie all the way, and, afterward, many of the young men (though not always the young women) say that it’s not only funny but true. They feel that way, I think, because the picture is unruly and surprising; it’s filled with the messes and rages of life in 2007 ....

Authentic as Ben and Alison seem to younger audiences, they are, like all the slacker-striver couples, strangers to anyone with a long memory of romantic comedy. Buster Keaton certainly played idle young swells in some of his silent movies, but, first humiliated and then challenged, he would exert himself to heroic effort to win the girl. In the end, he proved himself a lover. In the nineteen-thirties, the young, lean James Stewart projected a vulnerability that was immensely appealing. So did Jack Lemmon, in his frenetic way, in the fifties. In succeeding decades, Elliott Gould, George Segal, Alan Alda, and other actors played soulful types. Yet all these men wanted something. It’s hard to think of earlier heroes who were absolutely free of the desire to make an impression on the world and still got the girl. And the women in the old romantic comedies were daffy or tough or high-spirited or even spiritual in some way, but they were never blank. What’s going on in this new genre? “Knocked Up,” a raucously funny and explicit movie, has some dark corners, some fear and anxiety festering under the jokes. Apatow takes the slacker-striver romance to a place no one thought it would go. He also makes it clear, if we hadn’t noticed before, how drastically the entire genre breaks with the classic patterns of romantic comedy.

The sharpest critique of Apatow's movie that I've heard came from a woman I know, who argued that the debate about abortion is somewhat beside the point: The film's central implausibility isn't that Katherine Heigl's Alison would keep the child, but that she would keep the man. I think most people would agree that the leads' never-quite-resolved mismatch is, as Denby puts it later in his essay, "the weakest element in the movie"; the question is whether it's something to be forgiven with a laugh or endured with a shudder. I forgave it and laughed my way through the movie, but then again I'm a man; my friend was one of those less-amused young women Denby has in mind, and she argued (persuasively) that you could easily read Knocked Up as a film about the awful things that a woman will accept to ease the terrible vulnerability of pregnancy. Only a deep, unsettling and not-at-all-funny desperation, in her view, could explain why Alison would accept as a boyfriend (and presumably a husband) a man as gross, insensitive, underemployed and immature as Seth Rogen's Ben - a guy, she pointed out, who goes on a profane rant in a crowded restaurant when Alison tells him that she's pregnant, tries to beg a blowjob from her on their second date, invites her over to fast-forward through porn movies to help him get his dot-com smut empire off the ground, abandons her to rescue his bong during an earthquake, and so on and so forth, with precious few romantic gestures thrown in to mitigate his blundering. (He gets a job, eventually reads some baby books, and ... that's about it.) His rants are funny, sure, and he's basically good-hearted, but would you want your daughter to marry him? Or more aptly, would you want your daughter to be so freaked out by her pregnancy that she felt like she had to make it work with him?

I'm still turning over these questions in my mind.

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Comments (24)

I'm 50-something guy. I share the feelings of your female friend. We have a movie about a beautiful, successful woman who gets pregnant by an immature loser and is faced with three choices: abortion, marriage or being a single mom. She makes the choice that is most likely to ruin her life. Critics call this a comedy and a feel good movie. I don't see it.

Ross,
Katha Pollitt raised similar points: http://www.thenation.com/blogs/anotherthing?pid=208723

I'm pushing 60 and was about to make a comment along the lines of Steven Donegal's above. If this is a feel-good movie.... (I haven't seen it, by the way, just going by the descriptions.)

Ross:

I think you are now much closer to the truth than you were before. The truth is that in real life, the smart thing for someone in Ms. Heigl's character's position to do is either (a) have an abortion, (b) give the kid up for adoption, or (c) raise the child yourself, in that order.

The worst marriages result from women who feel they have to stay with a guy because he inseminated her, or feel they parenthood will make the guy "responsible", etc.

Single motherhood is not a great idea except for the very rich or set in life, as it can do great harm to one's career and earning stream and take an emotional toll. But that doesn't mean staying married to a lousy man isn't worse.

I still say the correct answer is "have the abortion", though. And I'd venture to say that in truth, most women agree-- there are, after all, over a million of the procedures performed every year in the US.

I think the reason for the popularity of the movie is there are lots of loser guys out there who rather than be told to grow up like the fantasy that they can be losers and land someone like Katherine Heigl

What Eric said

I think it's incredibly sad that so many of you equate her value with beauty, and money. I'd rather surround myself with good people, people who are funny, kind, and unpretensious-- as Seth Rogans character is in the movie-- than people who are rich and attractive.

Freddie, I think it is more about having a job that actually pays the bills...

Re: Freddie, I think it is more about having a job that actually pays the bills...

Assuming a couple can live OK on one income, would it be that appalling to have a house-husband instead of a housewife? I know three couples for whom that situation is more of less the case-- wife with a well-paying career, husband home with the kids, and doing occasional odd jobs for extra cash. And it appears to work for them.

Right. It just seems to me that critiques of this kind are prefaced on the notion that she's too good for him because she's hot and makes a lot of money. Isn't that a very shallow way to judge someone?

It isn't that he doesn't make money. It is that he is a slacker slob who wants to sit around eating, drinking and watching porn all day.

If he were teaching school or something it would be different. Why a person has no money matters.

Again I say the popularity is male wish fulfillment.

40 year old Virgin in contrast was IMHO a much better film. Carrell's character was actually someone worthy of a woman's respect. It was much more about the idea of ignoring outward appearance to see the positive character underneath.

Re: It isn't that he doesn't make money. It is that he is a slacker slob who wants to sit around eating, drinking and watching porn all day.

I haven't seen the movie so I may be getting this all wrong, but doesn't the guy change, at least to the point of owning up to his fatherhood role and marrying the woman? Yes, she may end up being the breadwinner, but again I see nothing wrong with that. How many stories have the other situation, an unbearable female (usually haughty or bitchy, not lazy) who is "tamed" to domesticity by the love of a good man?

There is a whole genre of movies that involves superior women matched with inferior men--Buffalo 66, Chasing Amy, now this. Oddly enough, many of the protagonists seem to be thinly disguised versions of the writer/director. A certain male self-regard seems to be at issue, not just with Aptow but more generally.

No, no, no. Alison spends a good portion of the movie rejecting Ben, because she doesn't want her sister's marriage. And Ben doesn't want her brother-in-law's marriage, so in that sense, they're even. (That marriage is as much the subject of the movie as anything.) She doesn't settle for him during a desperate pregnancy.

It's also clear that Alison is at least somewhat attracted to Ben, and is from the very beginning. He is also to be the father of her child, so she is committed to some sort of on-going relationship with him, whether romantic or not. So, given that, why not try the romance to see if it clicks?

JonF:

Yes, he actually gets a job (a pretty good one in some computer company, good enough that he can buy a house in a better part of town)... what might be implausible is his conversion, and her willingness to accept him back b/c she was in need (about to deliver), even though he hadn't shown any evidence of a change.

I find the Ben/Allison romance the weakest element of (very good) 'Knocked Up' as well. Allison is underdeveloped as a character & it smacks of male fantasy but I don't think Ben isn't getting enough credit from some here. Ben makes significant chances throughout the film. He accepts adult responsibility with his job. He makes a sweet little baby room at his new apartment. Most importantly, Ben is the one who helps Allison thourgh her birth, dealing with the Doctor, her sister, & and other complications. His role as a partner at the birth of his & Allison's child is what wins her for him. The film is a classic rake's progress story with Ben having to leave behind his childish (rather than rakish) manner & lifstyle in order to prove himself worthy of Allison.

Re: what might be implausible is his conversion, and her willingness to accept him back b/c she was in need (about to deliver), even though he hadn't shown any evidence of a change.

Hmm. There may be an element of female fantasy here too. Women (in general, not everyone of course) are known for having a certain attraction to irresponsible but fun "bad boys" and for ignoring Mr. Right-and-Responsible-but-oh-so-Dull to chase after men who will not make good husbands or fathers. The fantasy part comes in when the woman tells herself "Oh, I can change him, keep some of the fun, but teach him to settle down too."

Aside from the very important abortion issue not confronted here, when I see a movie where an unattractive, nerdy woman, part of a group of three of the same, walks away with Prince Charming, I'll take Aptow seriously.

Patricia,

The reality of the situation is that "unattractive, nerdy" men end up with "cool, attractive" women more often than the other way around. And it's not just a cultural thing. There are pretty well substantiated evolutionary bases for it.

That doesn't mean it's a desirable or just circumstance. It's just the truth. And claiming you won't "take Apatow seriously" because of it is kind of silly.

I'm a woman, and, contrary to David Denby's generalizations about what my sex thinks about "Knocked Up," I thought it handled the abortion issue just fine. Alison is a fundamentally decent young woman who decides not to kill her baby. Instead, she takes a brave and generous leap into the unknown with the new life she has helped bring into being. She's got guts. I don't get all the people who claim to be pro-choice on abortion but then whine and wring their hands when someone excercises her right to choose...not to have one.

"Knocked Up" is a movie about growing up. Ben starts out as a slacker, but by the end of the movie, he's quite the opposite--as when he reads the riot act to Alison's obstetrician, finds a doctor who can competently deliver the baby, and gently but firmly gets Alison out of that bathtub and into the hospital. If he hadn't, that baby would be dead. He takes charge, and in so doing, he saves his child's life. And this is exactly what Alison has been waiting for him to do: be a grown-up man who can take care of a wife and child and function as a husband and father. What better sort of man could she get? These aren't token gestures--they're the real thing. (And BTW, while Ben's a shade on the chubby side, by the end of the movie, he looks pretty attractive to me.)

Remember that Alison's not perfect, either. She's a control freak, which, as the movie shows us, isn't always a good thing: she picks the wrong doctor, despite her obsessive interviews, and she insists on "natural childbirth" for exactly the kind of birth in which it's not a good idea. Her unplanned pregnancy and the events that follow teach her the folly of assuming that life can be planned. Learning that lesson is Alison's way of growing up.

I think the reason for the popularity of the movie is there are lots of loser guys out there who rather than be told to grow up like the fantasy that they can be losers and land someone like Katherine Heigl

Apparently you missed the multiple scenes between Ben (Seth Rogen) and his father (Harold Ramis) where he almost begs his father to tell him to grow up. He seeks and probes his father for advice, and for someone to tell him what to do, but his father is of little help.

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